Staying Sane and Sober during the Holidays [Eric Mackay]

The holiday season can be a tough time to navigate sobriety, particularly for those of us who spend time at clubs and concerts. “As someone who has been sober for over three and a half years, and with more than 25 years in the music industry,” writes Eric Mackay. “I’ve experienced this struggle firsthand.”

Staying Sane and Sober during the Holidays

by Eric Mackay, CEO and Founder of songwriter rights and royalties management platform imbr

The holidays are a season filled with joy, togetherness, and celebration—or at least that’s the idea. For many, it’s also a period fraught with social pressures, awkward interactions, and endless parties where alcohol flows freely. As someone who has been sober for over three and a half years, and with more than 25 years in the music industry, I’ve experienced this struggle firsthand. Sobriety, while a game-changer in my personal and professional life, doesn’t shield me from the challenges that come with holiday festivities. The good news? It’s entirely possible to navigate this season with grace, dignity, and a clear head.

“colleagues might view a refusal to drink as a lack of participation or camaraderie”

The generational divide in attitudes toward alcohol becomes especially evident during holiday festivities. Recent studies show that 42% of Gen Z chooses not to drink at all—a stark contrast to older generations, where social drinking has long been ingrained as a cornerstone of workplace networking and celebration. For younger professionals, the choice to abstain often stems from prioritizing mental health, wellness, or simply finding alternative ways to connect socially. This shift can create tension in multigenerational workplaces where more experienced colleagues might view a refusal to drink as a lack of participation or camaraderie.

Here are six actionable strategies to help you hold your own during the holidays, whether you’re sober, sober-curious, or just looking to cut back on drinking this year.

1. Reflect and Set Intentions Before Events

Before walking into any holiday gathering, take a moment to ground yourself. Reflect on what you hope to achieve from the event—whether it’s connecting with colleagues, supporting a friend, or simply enjoying the festive atmosphere. Setting an intention helps anchor you to your values and equips you with a clear mindset when faced with peer pressure or social anxiety.

“alcohol isn’t necessary for meaningful conversations”

For example, if you’re aiming to prioritize authentic connections, remind yourself that alcohol isn’t necessary for meaningful conversations. Intentions aren’t about perfection; they’re about giving yourself a compass when the noise of the season threatens to pull you off course.

2. Embrace Acceptance Over Perfection

The holidays often bring a strange obligation to match others’ pace, particularly when it comes to drinking. It’s easy to feel like an outlier if you’re not holding a glass of wine at an office party or to worry that others will judge you for skipping the champagne toast.

Here’s the secret: most people are too focused on themselves to notice what’s in your glass. Allow yourself the freedom to simply be. Let go of the need to “keep up” and instead focus on enjoying the moment. Whether you’re sipping soda water or abstaining altogether, your choices are a reflection of your strength, not a flaw in the festive fabric.

3. Seek Support and Practice Humility

The holiday season isn’t just hard for those navigating sobriety; it’s challenging for anyone trying to prioritize mental and physical health. Lean into this shared experience. Find allies who understand your goals, whether they’re colleagues at work, close friends, or a partner. A simple text to a trusted friend before or during an event can provide the reassurance you need to hold firm to your boundaries.

Humility plays a big role here. Accept that it’s okay to lean on others, to admit that some situations feel daunting, and to ask for support when you need it. You don’t have to do this alone.

4. Embrace Vulnerability in Social Situations

One of the hardest parts of attending social gatherings is addressing questions about your sobriety or moderation. When someone asks, “Why aren’t you drinking?” it’s tempting to deflect or offer an excuse. Instead, try a straightforward response: “I’m taking a break from drinking” or “I just feel better without it.”

You’d be surprised how often vulnerability diffuses tension. People appreciate authenticity, and more often than not, your honesty will inspire respect—or even spark a deeper conversation.

5. Foster Genuine Connections to Shift Focus

Alcohol has long been seen as the ultimate social lubricant, but the truth is, meaningful connections happen without it. This season, challenge yourself to engage fully with others. Ask thoughtful questions, listen actively, and let the conversations flow naturally. Focus on creating shared experiences that don’t revolve around drinking—like a group dinner.

Not only will this approach deepen your relationships, but it will also keep the emphasis on what truly matters: connection, not cocktails.

6. Prepare for Discomfort and Strengthen Self-Control

Let’s face it: holiday events can be overwhelming, and sometimes the easiest option feels like just giving in to the crowd. But discomfort is temporary. Remind yourself that the awkward moments will pass, and with each situation you navigate successfully, your confidence will grow.

If all else fails, remember that you always have an out. Politely excuse yourself from the event if it becomes too much. Leaving early isn’t a sign of failure; it’s a recognition that your well-being comes first. And contrary to what your inner critic might say, no one is judging you for choosing to protect your peace.

The holidays can be a beautiful time to strengthen bonds and create lasting memories, but they can also test your resolve. By reflecting on your intentions, embracing imperfection, and leaning on the support of others, you can navigate this season without compromising your sobriety—or your sanity. So go ahead, show up, set boundaries, and enjoy the moments that matter. After all, there’s nothing more refreshing than starting the new year clear-headed and full of purpose.

You can find more insights on how to become a more mindful and effective music industry professional here.

Eric Mackay is a respected music industry executive and entrepreneur with over 25 years of experience, known for championing creators’ rights and diversity through innovative ventures. He has founded several music and music technology businesses and held influential roles, including EVP Global Digital Strategy at Warner Chappell Music Publishing and VP International Business Affairs at VEVO. At Warner Chappell, he led digital initiatives that maximized songwriter value, while at VEVO, he shaped international video strategy. His work at CELAS and PRS for Music focused on protecting songwriter catalogs. Early in his career, he managed Atomic Kitten, contributing to their global success with over 14 million record sales.