21 Things You Didn’t Know About Music Critics
By Everett True, music critic and blogger at Collapse Board.
With thanks to Mof Gimmers, whose recent comment on this thread inspired this:
- Music critics are NOT fucking cool – never have been, never will be
- Music critics couldn’t give a shit about pleasing the crowd
- Music critics don’t give a shit about the Next Big Thing
- Music critics do not have friends
- Music criticism is not a stand-in for celebrity
- Music critics hate people who think everything’s OK really
- Music critics couldn’t give a fuck about getting their name on the door
- Music critics couldn’t give a fuck about pissing off ‘contacts’
- Music critics couldn’t give a fuck about impressing musicians
- Music critics couldn’t give a fuck about impressing readers
- Music critics couldn’t give a fuck about impressing themselves
- Music critics are not third-rate academics looking for some easy cash on the side
- Music critics couldn’t give a fuck about promotional budgets
- Music critics are not failed journalists
- Music critics are not failed musicians
- Music critics do not ‘meet and greet’
- Music critics do not hang out with other music critics
- Music criticism is not a stand-in for bedroom eyes
- Music criticism is not a band aid
- Music critics couldn’t give a fuck who they piss off
- Music critics DO NOT CARE about cool
Collapse Board: fighting to make music criticism unswervingly un-cool again.
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I cringed so hard my face almost came off
Whoever wrote this post seems to really want everyone in the world to know how cool it is that he doesn’t give a fuck.
So music critics are self-aggrandizing loners who compensate for poor social skills and insecurity with artificial posturing?
Is that you Anne Rice?
Also, was this originally a Live Journal post?
I think the ultimate music critic joke as told here
http://londonjazz.blogspot.co.uk/2009/06/ultimate-music-critic-joke.html
remains unchallenged
Haha! I hope this is a joke.
Yawn. Somebody got frustrated. Always look up experienced music reviewers & read their testimonials to avoid getting lame reviews…
Usually Hypebot keeps the content super high quality. This post is the exception. Dear god this was dumb.
WTF? This probably the least intelligent, and most absurd article ever on this site. Lucky the write doesn’t give a fuck.
Hypebot – not sure if this was meant as a joke, but there wasn’t anything amusing, interesting or informative about it … please don’t put shite up like this, it demeans you and flies in the face of your otherwise excellent content.
this was horrible. please dont ever publish anything from this person.
This is one of the stupidest things I’ve ever read.
Funny Post. Much enjoyed it. It’s always good to get a little humor to help break up the workday …..It’s also amazing how devoid of any sense humor some of your other readers are….Glad I don’t have to work with any of them. 🙂
This is adoooooorable.
I’m kind of like d guy. I want to know more about dis guy.